When Staring Into the Abyss...
by RaichuTec
Summary: Touga's gotten too good at the game of manipulation, but at the cost of his soul. [Yaoi 'n' Stuff]


(Standard Disclaimer: The characters and such in Utena are not mine, I'm just playing with a few of them for awhile and I promise to return them to the toybox when I'm done.)

**When Staring Into the Abyss...**

(Be certain it's not staring back into you.)

The night held a slight chill, the breeze airy but light, winding through loose red locks to lazily toss them over Touga's shoulder one strand at a time. Lounging back atop the precious convertible owned by one Chairman Akio Ohtori, he gazed up toward the night skies above, regarding the velvet ink resplendent with diamond stars. Akio chose a stretch of pasture to park in, leaving them well outside the academy and the streetlights that lined the roadways. Only the soft susurration of the wind combined with the rise and fall of droning crickets filled the silence, except for the squeak of his uniform jacket against the cartop as he leaned back further, clasping his hands behind his head. He had gone with Akio to the Ends of the World, and taken Saionji along for the ride. Shown him the truth, at last, and with that knowledge convinced him to fight for the Rose Bride, again, and defeat Utena at last. How difficult it had been, for once. Touga rarely needed to convince his old friend of anything. But, gone were those trusting days of youth, when those violet eyes looked toward Touga for guidance. Saionji had begun to grow up and gain a will of his own.

The sound of a soft sigh dug Touga out of his revelries, turning his head to press a cheek against the cool paint of the car. Saionji lay sprawled against the hood, jacket flared open now with Akio hovering above him, their mouths locked together in a long, deep kiss. He watched from under a flutter of lashes, eyes half lidded and drowsy, as his friend was drawn further into the chairman's lustful desires. The scene was not unfamiliar to him, other than he was not usually the unobtrusive observer, but the one being driven wild by Akio's skillful touch.

And something about that truly bugged him.

The realization knit his brows in contemplation, turning the thought over and over again in his mind. He felt nothing for Akio, recognizing a master manipulator when he saw one, for as the old adage did say, _takes one to know one_. Touga learned what he could from the man who became his mentor in psychological warfare, and understood that he might be the biggest fish in the classroom, but Akio would swallow him whole in any other setting.

No, he wasn't jealous of Saionji kissing Akio, he realized, he was jealous of Akio kissing Saionji. The way those emerald curls and ringlets splayed across the hood of the car, turned a darker, inkier evergreen beneath the darkness above, the way Saionji sighed and turned his head, clearly in Akio's thrall, truly bothered Touga and he couldn't quite figure out why. Saionji's eyes opened to regard the man occupying the other side of the hood, languidly vacant, while the chairman trailed down the column of his throat with tongue and lips. Their gazes locked, blue to violet, and held.

_"Hey, Touga?" Saionji asked after another round of kendo sparring. Only eleven and twelve respectively and they never left each other's sides, never would either. Touga was everything to the green haired youth, his mentor, his best friend, his protector. "You think Risuu will be waiting for me again?"_

_"Nah," Touga replied. The bokkan were slung from his shoulder this time, casually held onto in the palm of one hand, even as they clanked together while the pair walked. "Besides, I'll walk you back home. If he's there, he'll have to tangle with me to get to you."_

_"I will protect you... now and always._

_Now and always._

"Now and always..."

Akio glanced up at the soft interruption to see Touga watching so intently, lips splaying into a knowing smile. The gaze of a predator stalking his prey and knowing how exactly to separate it from the rest of the pack. But unlike the great hunters of the wild, Akio did his stalking sheerly for the joy of it. "Touga-san... come here." He reached over to grab the redhead's jacket sleeve, impatient for Touga to rise at his own leisurely pace. Curious, Saionji began to prop himself up on his elbows, only to swiftly be held down by Akio's body, straddling him against the hood of the car. "Ne, Kyouichi... you stay there... "

Touga felt his hackles rising, familiar and cold against the back of his neck. Something about the way Akio's voice shifted to honey sweet, like fruit ripened past its prime, dripping off the vine. He knew that voice well, for he had often employed it in the past. But to Akio he was as helpless as any of the innocent schoolgirls who flocked to their redheaded Student Council President on a daily basis. A babe in the presence of a wolf. But at least Touga knew what he was in for. Saionji, though perceptive in his own right, had no way to defend himself against his best friend, let alone a practiced professional casanova such as Akio.

Despite his misgivings, Touga soon found his mouth captured in a rough, demanding kiss and returned it with equal fervor, the grip of his chin by Akio's hand pried loose within a moment's time. He didn't like being dominated, that was his job. For the effort, Akio chuckled at him, drawing back while brushing at the flowing red mane. "It would be his first time, ne? Why don't you take him, then. Yes. Far easier to accept from his _best_ friend."

Touga growled in a throaty, yet playful manner, "Saionji has always been _mine_. Do you think I would let you have him before me?" A ploy, for in reality Touga knew who was really the master and who was the slave, it was simply not something he wanted to admit so readily and certain not in front of Saionji.

Again, Saionji attempted to rise, this time held down by both Akio and Touga. Violet eyes had lost their earlier sheen of seduced luster, hardened now with that perceptive, rational mind he possessed. "I think it's time to go back to Ohtori. I've had enough of this."

"No, I don't think so, Kyouichi," Akio replied, his smile quiet and confident. He reached down to jerk the uniform jacket open further with a violent motion that resounded with the echo of tearing fabric. "Tomorrow you fight to win the Rose Bride back. Tonight, you learn your place in the scheme of things." His voice had changed, Touga realized with an inward, nervous mental note. The richly seductive voice held a violent cast to it, for Saionji had commented the greatest of transgressions... he bowed out of the game. He shirked Akio's will before the duels were finished. The chairman had hinted at his displeasure and Touga had intervened on Saionji's behalf, drawing his old friend in again with the proper bait.

Just the look on Saionji's face set a cold stone in his throat. Touga swallowed hard to rid himself of it, keeping his mask on tightly, right down to the jaded apathy to his half-lidded eyes. He knew what thoughts swirled in his friend's head, that inner fear of being trapped between two lions who eyed him like a piece of meat tossed into their den. _I have to be this way, Saionji. I wish I could tell you this, but for now I can't. I have lain with the devil and sold him my soul and now I'm thrice damned for selling yours with it._ Though the abject fear never quite left his friend's eyes, Touga leaned in to join their mouths, to claim him utterly and completely right there.

It worked, for Akio found it amusing enough to back off, allow the two friends to embrace there on the hood of his car. It would last the rest of the night, and deep within Touga knew Saionji would never forgive him, not entirely. It made their pleasures hollow and fleeting, like marionette dolls prodded through the motions by the strings their master plucked. He could only hold his best friend close and brush his fingers through those evergreen locks in a futile gesture of comfort.

And pray that come the dawn he would not have killed whatever humanity in him that remained.


End file.
